The New Year

This past year has been quite a busy year for us. We have been busy making plans, making changes and recovering from the last few years of incredible struggle, heartache, growth, and general full submersion in the Refiners Fire.

The family blog will be making a comeback after the first of the year. I am busy writing new posts that have been brewing for years.

If you are or were a reader please let me know, it motivates me to write more!

Over a year later

So, We now have another child! I don't think I have written since before I was pregnant. Levi is now 4 months old, Megan is 6 and Jake is quickly approaching 5. Time flies. Michael is job searching again, but this time we are handling it better... I think. I have been using Facebook to update everyone instead of the blog. I really don't have the time or energy to do a blog as well. Updates will be few and far between. I am really not sure anyone checks it anymore anyway.

I am one week into a new year of home school. I go back and forth on whether or not I am capable of doing this. Obviously I am but it really is difficult. Self doubt is always lurking. We start our home school co-op next week as well as soccer for Jacob. Megan ballet has already started and the teachers were so impressed with her ballet ability that they encouraged her to focus on ballet and drop tap since she wasn't as interested in it.

Levi is currently re-learning to sleep through the night. I has spoiled him and I admit it. He has had such a tough beginning in life that I have held him and rocked him as much as I could. Now as a little four month old he is cutting two teeth and I think it is waking him up at night. So, at 4:30am you can expect I am awake waiting for him to put himself back to sleep so I can sleep. I have been moving Jake to my bed each night so that it doesn't disturb his sleep. We will survive! We always do!

I think we get it now.

(Spring pictures)



I am attempting to write this without crying.

God's goodness is just so overwhelming.

December 2006 we moved here thinking we had it all together, we could do this and we were going to do it well. God had different ideas about who was in control and how it was going to be done. From day one when the tornado sirens were blasting as we pulled up to our brand new house until this week we have been 100% out of control of anything. God has kept us healthy for the most part and we have clung to each other through it all. I won't even say that it is over. But God has certainly shown us that if we are going to be doing his ministry it is on his terms and we have to have 100% faith and trust in him. We have all heard it a million times... trust in God with everything you have... but who can really put themselves aside and give it all over? God has allowed it all to be taken away from us. We knew that we had done everything we could and the only other thing we could do was to give it all over to him and WAIT.

Here is a brief rundown of this past month.

~June 30th was Michael's last day of employment at ***** mortgage
~June 27th and 30th Michael was given vacation days off
~June 30th Michael starts 30 day contract as business consultant for neighbors new oil and gas company
~July 10 Michael is offered job with large company 15 minutes from home
~July 17th (today) Michael accepts new job starting August 1st
~August 31st Michael's severance ends from ***** mortgage

Michael will not have gone even one day without employment and will have had 9 weeks of double pay! It's really all a bit overwhelming right now but the paperwork has been signed and turned in and this really is happening. FYI this job will take care of all of our needs and surpass anything we ever expected!

We tried to do it all on our own, we tried giving ALMOST everything over, but only when we can say with hands thrown up and tear filled eyes "it's all yours God we can't do it!!!" does he give us rest.

It's been weeks since Michael and I have been able to sing during worship at our church. We have been so raw, so on the edge, so overwhelmed with God's goodness. The songs we sing are so much more real. If we were to sing it would sound like craziness because all that would come out would be a weird combo of overjoyed, singing/sobbing amazement. It's strange really, we have been in the middle of our most confusing, uncertain, scary period of time and yet what we are filled with is praises to God. I have literally felt like falling down on my face because I have felt so overcome by his presence. I guess I really lack the words to describe what we have been feeling. We have been at peace and know that God will, as always, provide for us what we need in his own timing. Unlike the past we haven't been filled with fear and stressed out to the max about everything. We knew we just needed to wait for what God had for us. If this was the lesson... it's not been an easy one to learn.

Ted Griggs

Michael's brother Ted had his big surgery yesterday. It went very well according to the doctors. They had to take his entire pancreas and some surrounding lymph nodes, the gall bladder, spleen, and other tissue that could be effected if there was any cancer. Initial study shows that the cancer was NOT malignant, the tumor had not even grown!!! This is great news obviously. The family is very relieved. He will spend several days in ICU and then several weeks in the hospital recovering. He will have to take insulin for the rest of his life but that seems at this point a small price to pay to live a full healthy life.

Thank you all for your prayers. It has meant a lot to our family to know that there are so many out there lifting him up. Please pray for a quick and full recovery for him and continued strength for the family.

here it is

*Michael will be laid off as of June 30th.
*We got more severance then we thought we would.
*We are now facing some major setbacks in the moving plans due to gross under-estimation of our property taxes by our mortgage company.
*We have everything lined up for Michael to get his accelerated teaching certification over the summer!
*Michael felt like his 2 interviews with local schools went really well today!
*Michael's brother Ted is having surgery to remove tumor in his pancreas on May 9th. It may have grown. He will probably end up having a whipple procedure (MAJOR surgery) that has a 5-6 month recovery time.
*This last 17 months since leaving Charlotte has been the hardest we have ever had. Even so, unless God decides to grant us a miracle, we are facing an even harder next few months.
*Megan fell and we thought for a little while she may have broken her arm but praise God it was only bruised.
*We are all feeling healthy, worn out and drained, but healthy.

Moving update

Well, it's been another crazy week for us. Our property manager apparently misrepresented some information to our renters and they have taken back their 30 day notice. They were obligated to the end of the lease (May 31st) whether they lived in our house or not so they have decided to take their time moving out instead of rushing to get out by the end of this month. They were not aware of the lease terms apparently. Anyway, I have had to take a step back and re-evaluate again. I have some cabinets emptied out and all the books are packed. Plus I have packed up 2 large boxes of the kids toys and taken down some of the decorations off the walls including the curtains. I really have no desire to unpack anything at this point. I will have to find a place to put the packed boxes until we can move in May.

I am not terribly upset about it all. I was looking very forward to getting into my gardens and the kids having room to play without bumping into things. Jake wanted to roll on the floor this week but we couldn't find a big enough space for him to do it without hitting his head on furniture or running into a wall. Overall I feel very blessed to have this townhouse. It has been a great place for us to live for a time. I really started having a hard time with it after the seminary laid Michael off. I was angry, hurt, and wanted to get away from this place. Sadly, I have found more people away from here that I have become friends with. It was not my expectation at all. I found I don't fit in very well here. I am either not conservative enough, or something, who knows. Whatever! Right? Anyway, I am still looking very forward to going back to our house. I know God has a plan for us and is looking out for us. Right now He wants us to stay put for a bit longer and that's okay.

Things are starting to pick back up again. January and February are always a bit slow. We have lots of Birthday parties to go to, class functions, zoo trips, play dates, strolls through the Botanic Gardens, etc. I can never forget about the packing though, it is my lot in life right now to be in a perpetual state of packing or unpacking. I can deal. The kids are great, Megan is going to be 5 years old in only a few months, then I will be hitting 30! Jacob is in the middle of a growth spurt. He has been waking up with growing pains. I am glad we are entering shorts season... they don't go all high-water on me when he grows a few inches:) I am trying to prepare Megan for a "little" brother who may just pass her up in height in the next year. He has weighed the same or more than her for about a year now. I get the twins questions now more than ever.

Michael still has nothing to do at work. It was announced this weekend that his parent company is laying off 15% of their employees over the next few months (ends up being in the 5K range). It could be a huge blessing that we have a few more months to rethink our moving plans if he does get laid off again. We are thinking career change this time if it does happen.

Michael's brother Ted is going to his surgeon today about the tumor in his pancreas. He could need major surgery done very quickly. Please pray for him. If it is cancerous it could be pretty bad.

My mom is having major knee surgery on Tuesday. This will be the 3rd time trying to fix it but the most major one yet. She will have a pretty long recovery time this time and might even have to miss her annual trip to Kenya. Please pray for a smooth surgery and quick recovery for her. She is pretty sick and tired of being held back by her knee.

I hope you are all doing great! Keep us updated and in your prayers.

The News

So I have been hinting at some big things to come and now I can let you know what it is. We are moving back into our house! We told the kids this week and have started packing again. Our renters new home was ready for them earlier than expected and they are going to be out by the end of this month. We are very excited about going back to the house, the kids have been grabbing boxes and packing whatever they can think of. Looks like I am going to have to do some unpacking this week too:) So far they have packed up all their books, their dolls and stuffed animals (including some we had to get back out for bed time last night) and some clothes. Jacob woke up this morning and asked "are we still moving back to our nighthawk house?" he is still skeptical I think. As soon as I told him yes he started hopping around excited all over again like when we first told him. I think it's going to be a new excitement everyday for the next few weeks for him. Megan wanted to know how long we were going to stay at our house this time. It really makes me sad that this is a question my 4 year old is asking. I know God has a plan for us and reasons behind all the things that we have endured since moving here over a year ago. I would NEVER classify it as a cakewalk or even a LITTLE bit easy but I know that it has been a necessary part of our journey.

Michael's office had a big meeting yesterday and informed everyone that they are going to be merging with another company. The integration/consolidation will be complete by June 30th. Hopefully we won't have to go through another lay-off, but considering that Michael has had nothing to do all day long everyday since he got there, we would not be shocked. The mortgage industry is not one to be in right now obviously. Please pray for us when you think of us. We love you all.